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As when exposed to the rays of the sun at mid-day, we
hardly see the brightness before we suddenly feel the
heat; so the light of faith has no sooner spread the
splendour of its truths in our understanding, but
immediately our will feels the holy heat of heavenly
love.
Faith makes us know by an infallible certitude
that God is, that he is infinite in goodness, that he
can communicate himself unto us, and not only that he
can, but that he will; so that by an ineffable
sweetness he has provided us with all things
requisite to obtain the happiness of immortal glory.
Now we have a natural inclination to the sovereign
good, by reason of which our heart is touched with a
certain inward anxious desire and continual
uneasiness, not being able in any way to quiet
itself, or to cease to testify that its perfect
satisfaction and solid contentment are wanting to it.
But when holy faith has represented to our
understanding this lovely object of our natural
inclinations Oh! Theotimus, what joy! what pleasure!
how our whole soul is thrilled, and, all amazed at
the sight of so excellent a beauty, it cries out with
love: Behold, thou art fair, my beloved, behold thou
art fair!(1)
Eliezer sought a wife for the son of his master
Abraham; how could he tell whether he should find her
beautiful and gracious as he desired? But when he had
found her at the fountain, and saw her so excellent
in beauty and so perfect in sweetness, and especially
when he had obtained her, he adored God, and blessed
him with thanksgiving, full of incomparable joy.
Man's heart tends to God by its natural
inclination, without fully knowing what he is; but
when it finds him at the fountain of faith, and sees
him so good, so lovely, so sweet and gracious to all,
and so ready to give himself, as the sovereign good,
to all who desire him, -- O God! what delight! and
what sacred movements in the soul, to unite itself
for ever to this goodness so sovereignty amiable! I
have found, says the soul thus inspired, I have at
last found that which my heart desired, and now I am
at rest. And as Jacob, having seen the fair Rachel,
after he had holily kissed her, melted into tears of
sweetness for the happiness he experienced in so
desirable a meeting, so our poor heart, having found
God, and received of him the first kiss, the kiss of
holy faith, it dissolves forthwith in sweetness of
love for the infinite good which it presently
discovers in that sovereign beauty.
We sometimes experience in ourselves a certain
joyousness which comes as it were unexpectedly,
without any apparent reason, and this is often a
presage of some greater joy; whence many are of
opinion that our good angels, foreseeing the good
which is coming unto us, give us by this means a
foretaste thereof, as on the contrary they give us
certain fears and terrors amidst dangers we are not
aware of, to make us invoke God's assistance and
stand upon our guard. Now when the presaged good
arrives, we receive it with open arms, and reflecting
upon the joyousness we formerly felt without knowing
its cause, we only then begin to perceive that it was
a forerunner of the happiness we now enjoy.
Even so, my dear Theotimus, our heart having had
for so long a time an inclination to its sovereign
good, knew not to what end this motion tended: but so
soon as faith has shown it, then man clearly discerns
that this was what his soul coveted, his
understanding sought, and his inclination tended
towards. Certainly, whether we wish or wish not, our
soul tends towards the sovereign good. But what is
this sovereign good?
We are like those good Athenians who sacrificed
unto the true God, although he was unknown to them,
till the great S. Paul taught them the knowledge of
him. For so our heart, by a deep and secret instinct,
in all its actions tends towards, and aims at,
felicity, seeking it here and there, as it were
groping, without knowing where it resides, or in what
it consists, till faith shows and describes the
infinite marvels thereof.
But then, having found the treasure it sought for,
- ah! what a satisfaction to this poor human heart!
What joy, what complacency of love! O I have met with
him, whom my heart sought for without knowing him! O
how little I knew whither my aims tended, when
nothing contented me of all I aimed at, because, in
fact, I knew not what I was aiming at. I was seeking
to love and knew not what to love, and therefore my
intention not finding its true love, my love remained
ever in a true but ignorant intention. I had indeed
sufficient foretaste of love to make me seek, but not
sufficient knowledge of the goodness I had to love,
to actually practise love.
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