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But, my daughter, I am going a step further, and I bid you
everywhere and in everything to rejoice in your own abjection.
Perhaps you will ask in reply what I mean by that. In Latin
abjection means humility, and humility means abjection, so that
when Our Lady says in the Magnificat that all generations shall
call her blessed, because God hath regarded the low estate of His
handmaiden, (1) she means that He has accepted her abjection and
lowliness in order to fill her with graces and favours.
Nevertheless, there is a difference between humility and
abjection; for abjection is the poverty, vileness and littleness
which exist in us, without our taking heed to them; but humility
implies a real knowledge and voluntary recognition of that
abjection. And the highest point of humility consists in not
merely acknowledging one's abjection, but in taking pleasure
therein, not from any want of breadth or courage, but to give the
more glory to God's Divine Majesty, and to esteem one's neighbour
more highly than one's self.
This is what I would have you do; and to explain myself more
clearly, let me tell you that the trials which afflict us are
sometimes abject, sometimes honourable. NOW many people will
accept the latter, but very few are willing to accept the former.
Everybody respects and pities a pious hermit shivering in his
worn-out garb; but let a poor gentleman or lady be in like case,
and they are despised for it,--and so their poverty is abject.
A religious receives a sharp rebuke from his superior meekly,
or a child from his parent, and every one will call it obedience,
mortification, wisdom; but let a knight or a lady accept the like
from some one, albeit for the Love of God, and they will forthwith
be accused of cowardice. This again is abject suffering. One
person has a cancer in the arm, another in the face; the former
only has the pain to bear, but the latter has also to endure all
the disgust and repulsion caused by his disease; and this is
abjection.
And what I want to teach you is, that we should not merely
rejoice in our trouble, which we do by means of patience, but we
should also cherish the abjection, which is done by means of
humility. Again, there are abject and honourable virtues; for the
world generally despises patience, gentleness, simplicity, and
even humility itself, while, on the contrary, it highly esteems
prudence, valour, and liberality. Sometimes even there may be a
like distinction drawn between acts of one and the same
virtue--one being despised and the other respected. Thus
almsgiving and forgiveness of injuries are both acts of charity,
but while every one esteems the first, the world looks down upon
the last.
A young man or a girl who refuses to join in the excesses of
dress, amusement, or gossip of their circle, is laughed at and
criticised, and their self-restraint is called affectation or
bigotry. Well, to rejoice in that is to rejoice in abjection. Or,
to take another shape of the same thing. We are employed in
visiting the sick--if I am sent to the most wretched cases, it is
an abjection in the world's sight, and consequently I like it. If
I am sent to those of a better class, it is an interior abjection,
for there is less grace and merit in the work, and so I can accept
that abjection.
If one has a fall in the street, there is the ridiculous part
of it to be borne, as well as the possible pain; and this is an
abjection we must accept. There are even some faults, in which
there is no harm beyond their abjection, and although humility
does not require us to commit them intentionally, it does require
of us not to be disturbed at having committed them. I mean certain
foolish acts, incivilities, and inadvertencies, which we ought to
avoid as far as may be out of civility and decorum, but of which,
if accidentally committed, we ought to accept the abjection
heartily, out of humility.
To go further still,--if in anger or excitement I have been led
to use unseemly words, offending God and my neighbour thereby, I
will repent heartily, and be very grieved for the offence, which I
must try to repair to the utmost; but meanwhile I will accept the
abjection and disgrace which will ensue, and were it possible to
separate the two things, I ought earnestly to reject the sin,
while I retained the abjection readily.
But while we rejoice in the abjection, we must nevertheless use
all due and lawful means to remedy the evil whence it springs,
especially when that evil is serious. Thus, if I have an abject
disease in my face, I should endeavour to get it cured, although I
do not wish to obliterate the abjection it has caused me. If I
have done something awkward which hurts no one, I will not make
excuses, because, although it was a failing, my own abjection is
the only result; but if I have given offence or scandal through my
carelessness or folly, I am bound to try and remedy it by a
sincere apology. There are occasions when charity requires us not
to acquiesce in abjection, but in such a case one ought the more
to take it inwardly to heart for one's private edification.
Perhaps you will ask what are the most profitable forms of
abjection. Unquestionably, those most helpful to our own souls,
and most acceptable to God, are such as come accidentally, or in
the natural course of events, because we have not chosen them
ourselves, but simply accepted God's choice, which is always to be
preferred to ours. But if we are constrained to choose, the
greatest abjections are best; and the greatest is whatever is most
contrary to one's individual
inclination, so long as it is in conformity with one's vocation;
for of a truth our self-will and self-pleasing mars many graces.
Who can teach any of us truly to say with David, "I had rather be
a doorkeeper in the house of my God, than to dwell in the tents of
ungodliness"? (2) None, dear child, save He Who lived and died the
scorn of men, and the outcast of the people, in order that we
might be raised up.
I have said things here which must seem very hard to
contemplate, but, believe me, they will become sweet as honey when
you try to put them in practice.
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